In a candid and insightful conversation on The Legal Odyssey Podcast, host Haylee Bramlet and attorney Kira Abernathy from Milton, Georgia, delve into the details of adoption in Georgia. Through Kira’s deep understanding and commitment to family law, she shares insights into Georgia’s adoption procedures, eligibility criteria, ethical challenges in legal practice, and the crucial emotional support she provides to families navigating the adoption process. Her reflections offer a beacon of encouragement and guidance to those seeking legal counsel or embarking on the complex journey of adoption in Georgia. Listen to the podcast episode here or dive in below!
What inspired you to pursue a career in law?
I became an attorney kind of an accident in a way. I thought I really wanted to do music and be in the music industry. Then I found out you could be a lawyer in the music industry writing contracts and supporting artists legally. I decided to go to law school and in law school I realized that I was not very interested in contract law. At the same time, I didn’t really want to be in the courtroom. Honestly, I didn’t want to step foot into a courtroom. I did not think I would ever do family law or criminal defense or prosecution. When I got out of law school, I still didn’t know exactly how I wanted to proceed so I took what was available to me. I took an internship at a prosecutor’s office and that is when I actually got to experience being an attorney. That is when I started to realize what I love about being an attorney and I began putting together my future as an attorney in Georgia. I never had an official job after I passed the bar. I had two mentors, one did family law, one did criminal defense. They passed me work that did both and I grew to love it and, now, I would never do anything different! I think it’s funny how I kind of just fell into being an attorney, changed my mind a couple times, and now I love what I do.
Your practice underwent a rebranding from Attorney KLA to “Your Law Firm” in 2023. Walk us through the reasons behind this change and how it reflects your approach to legal representation?
The official launch date of “Your Law Firm” was in 2023; however, we spent almost all of 2022 preparing. Prior to the rebranding, I was really struggling with the business side of the law firm. It was just me and the lawyering was going great! The business side is where I was struggling. I didn’t know how to be both a lawyer and a business owner. That’s one thing they don’t teach you in law school. Honestly, that’s one thing they don’t teach you in business school. I was working tons of hours. I honestly had a hard time with collections. I was doing all this work and not getting paid, but I still want to do good work, be a good lawyer. I began to feel stuck. Finally, I humbled myself and I asked my husband who is a business person and has a company with his business partner that all they do is build other businesses. Finally, after seven years, I was like, honey, I’m failing, can you please help me? He and his business partner took me through the whole process. They do business roadmaps where they really talk to you, figure out who’s your target audience, who are you as a company, who are you, what do you wanna be, what’s your, who do you, what’s your passion, and who do you love to serve?
Through that process, we discovered that we are really a people first law firm. We want to put people first, our clients, the judges, the other side, opposing counsel, our staff, ourselves as people, we want work-life balance. Also, I wanted to go beyond myself. I didn’t just want to be attorney Kira, I wanted it to be something for everyone.
Can you provide an overview of the adoption process in Georgia, particularly for relative adoptions or step-parent adoptions?
The good thing about relative and step parent adoptions is that you already know what child you’re going to adopt. It’s going to be someone who’s related to you that needs a parent or it is your stepchild. It takes the piece of finding the child to adopt out of the way.
To start the adoption process in Georgia, you need to get the voluntary surrender of the parent’s rights. If you’re a stepparent, you need to get the other parent’s voluntary surrender if you can locate them. Sometimes you can’t locate them. Sometimes they’re deceased and then, at that point, you just need the consent of your spouse at that point.
If you are a relative, you need to find the parents of the child and get their voluntary surrender of rights. If you cannot find the parents, or you cannot get them to surrender their rights, then you have to ask the court to terminate their rights. In order to get the court to terminate the parent’s rights you have to prove that they’re an unfit parent. You have to provide evidence, and there are tons of different ways you can do it, that shows they don’t need to be the parent and the child should be adopted by you.
Now, if the child is 14 years or older, you have to get their written consent for the adoption as well as the parent’s in Georgia. The adoption laws change often and the people who do the adoption laws here in Georgia are very involved.
What are the eligibility criteria for individuals seeking to adopt a child, especially when it comes to adopting a relative or stepchild in Georgia?
There are general eligibility requirements that apply to most adoptions; however, almost every adoption case is different in some way. No two adoptions are the exact same. Depending on the scenario of the child and the family the eligibility criteria can change.
One thing people often ask is, how old do you have to be to adopt a child? One of the general requirements to be able to adopt a child is that you have to be 21 years or older to adopt in Georgia. It used to be 25, but they recently changed it to 21 years old. However, if you’re married the requirements change. Married couples can adopt with their spouse at the age of 18 as long as both spouses are adopting the child.
Another common question is, Can I adopt my sibling? Again, we are going to run into several, if-then scenarios. Usually you have to be 10 years older than the child you want to adopt. They do look for that age gap. However, if you’re a step parent or a relative you do not have to have the 10 year age gap. So if a sibling wanted to adopt their sibling, for example, they don’t have to be 10 years older. However, they do have to be at least 21 years old, or 18 years old, married and living with their spouse with the spouse involved in the adoption.
As an attorney, how would you handle a situation where the other parent is not in agreement with the adoption?
You definitely can’t force it. You have to be so careful and stay ethical and act within the law. You can never say, “If you give up your rights, then we promise to do X,” “We promise we won’t come after you for child support or whatever.” That is illegal, and of course, unprofessional.
Typically the conversation starts with the sharing of paperwork and a thorough explanation of what is happening. I always recommend the parent gets their own attorney to review and explain the paperwork to them as well. We provide a deadline to get the paperwork signed and returned. If they don’t get it back to us, then we need to move for the court to actually terminate their rights. This is where you have to go to court and prove this is an unfit parent and that this parent shouldn’t be the parent of the child anymore. At this point, you have to have a full-blown court hearing and provide a clear and convincing evidence standard. Higher than the preponderance of the evidence, which is like 51%, but lower than criminal cases where they have to be proven beyond reason without a doubt. You have to pretty clearly convince the court that this parent shouldn’t be the parent and here are all the laws that back it up.
How do you, as the attorney, support your clients through the emotional aspects of the adoption case?
It can be really difficult as the attorney to have to tell a family or a child that they have to theoretically, not realistically, but theoretically put themselves back into the place that they are trying to get out of. Evidence needs to be collected and presented to the court and therefore, as the attorneys we must understand the details of the family’s situation.
We must always be very careful with how we speak to the child. Depending on the scenario, we will apply different strategies and techniques in order to collect the evidence. There are children that are okay speaking about their story because they want the adoption to occur successfully themselves, they want out of their current situation. Occasionally, depending if DFCS is involved, the case will be transferred to juvenile court or you can get it transferred to juvenile court. Then you may be able to get a guardian ad litem, which is an investigative person to help speak on behalf of and protect the child. They can kind of do more digging and interviewing and it’s a little bit better emotionally.
Can you provide insight into the post-adoption support and services available to families in Georgia?
Relatives are the first line of support that I always look for in adoption cases. If support is coming through relatives and from their own family group, the adoption cases tend to feel more positive. So I try to encourage support from the family group, and I see it so often. In a recent case I had, the whole family showed up, even ones from out of town and everyone was so supportive and it was amazing.
However, if you don’t have that, there are several other options to find support both throughout the adoption process and post-adoption. If you go through an adoption agency, they have a ton of resources. If you’re going through the state foster care or DFCS, whether it’s a relative or someone in foster care, DFCS will have several accessible resources, groups and recommendations.
Other than that, the best thing I can say is Google. Google around you and look for support for adoptive parents near me. You’ll be surprised at the communities that pop over this, whether it’s your church, or a group simply formed by people in the community.
I’m actually adopted and that’s actually what got me interested in adoptions. Growing up, my parents and their church had a group for adoptive parents and adopted children to connect, talk, communicate, and support. I was able to talk with them, talk with their parents, and talk with the other kids. It can be kind of daunting because it’s hard to find, but once you get in that community that has it, I mean, so many people are supportive of adoption anyway, because it’s just wonderful for the child and the children.
What is the typical timeline for completing a relative or stepparent adoption in Georgia, from the initial application to finalization?
The initial application is intensive. I really try to explain to my clients that the state wants a lot of information. They want to make sure you are who you say you are. They want to make sure the child is who they say they are. They want to make sure you’re related to them properly. Grandparent, great-grandparent, aunt, uncle, great-aunt, great-uncle or sibling. If you’re not one of those, you can’t do relative adoption. Now, once again, you don’t have to go through the process of finding a child, so that kind of shaves off some time. It will typically take about a month to two months just to get all of the initial information collected and prepared. As the attorney, I have to make sure we have all the documents because we need marriage certificates, if someone relevant is deceased you need to get a death certificate, if you’re divorced you need to get proof that you’re divorced, if you got remarried you need to get proof you got remarried. It is honestly a very invasive kind of thing and so I prep my clients for that and then once we draft all the paperwork, which you’re terminating parental rights, it’s even longer, they want a hearing within 120 days of filing. So, the timeline for an adoption can take as little as 6 months, but often can take up to a year. Of course, if it is really contested it can take even longer.
How can someone find an adoption attorney in Georgia?
What I would tell anyone looking for an attorney at all is, you have to make sure it’s someone that you’re comfortable with. In a way, ignore their accolades, right? It’s not going to matter if they are top 10 super lawyers. If you don’t get along with them and you don’t like them or they just seem cold or distant, you will not be comfortable with the experience.
Focus on communication. You can always reach someone in our office. We are always available, always accessible. It’s kind of one of our taglines. So you definitely want someone who’s going to answer your questions that you are comfortable with. And then of course, someone like you said, who’s experienced in adoption, or at least prepared to learn and do it and understands that this is a technical detailed process.
You want someone who is local to you because they’re going to be able to better know the court system. Each court’s different, even though the process is basically the same.
For someone that is seeking a family law attorney or maybe even going through an adoption case in Georgia, are there any final words of encouragement or advice that you’d like to leave?
You can do it. It doesn’t matter if it’s hard. It doesn’t matter if it looks like you’re not going to make it, you can do it. You’ve got this. If you’ve an attorney already, trust them. If you’re struggling with trust, tell them you are struggling with trust. Don’t be afraid to find someone else if you need to, but really at least try with your current attorney. You hired them for a reason. It’s going be great and you can do it.
Kira Abernathy’s narrative of accidental entry into the legal profession and subsequent dedication to family law and adoption cases serves as an inspiring testament to perseverance and adaptability. Her journey from uncertainty to finding purpose resonates with many navigating their career paths or facing challenging legal situations. Abernathy’s commitment to prioritizing the human aspect in her practice, evident in the rebranding of “Your Law Firm,” underscores her belief in placing people at the forefront of legal representation. Her invaluable insights into Georgia’s adoption processes, ethical considerations, and unwavering support for families undergoing emotional transitions reflect profound empathy.